Does Out of Sight Really Mean Out of Mind?

Self-Care is Important!___

Society has suggested and even programmed today’s Millennials to believe that something out of sight means that it is also out of mind- which is not a HEALTHY mentality to adopt. In my personal research and experience, I have found this statement to be enabling further mental destruction and distorted perception of the happenings of life. Sure, a situation or person is easier to forget or ignore if they are not visited (or revisited); however, if we do not address the issues or culprit for why we are not desiring to visit those things or people then we are simply just masking a bigger issue. Some Therapists and Psychologists believe that this toxic behavioral pattern mirrors the act of placing a bandaid over a bruise- Though it may cover the surface, the true damage is happening internally. If we continue to ignore feelings or experiences with no intervention of therapy or acknowledgment of the effects that it has, we will unknowingly develop mental triggers that will later cause self-sabotage.

Example: Let’s say that you have experienced a horrible break-up from a relationship that you thought would result in a life-long commitment to love and happiness. It brought hurt and feelings that you did not want to address so you both decided to not reflect and elaborate on the conclusion and completely go separate ways. Days later you both decide to block all forms of communication. To you, this is going to be away of not thinking about them and ultimately moving on with your life in another direction. What usually happens though is later down the line we start to see things and people that remind us of that person and then the hurts and experiences resurface and you discover that there were so many things you probably should’ve addressed and said when you had the chance.

Where Self-Sabotage Kicks In: Months later, you meet an individual and there is an immediate connection. You find yourself starting to feel hopeful of loving again but begin to notice habits of that person that reminds you of your past relationship. Though this new person has proven to be a breath of fresh air, you can’t seem to shake the fact that they may ultimately turn out like the last person. Although there is a likelihood that this occurrence may happen, we will likely miss countless opportunities in the future due to this type of fear. Rather than explaining your fears to the other person, you immediately disconnect and lose interest in that person- The cycle of neglecting internal damage (placing a bandaid on the bruise) has repeated!

See, out of sight does not always mean out of mind; Out of sight often proves to mean ‘REWIND’. What we do not deal with internally will ultimately repeat at a later stage in life. It is a cyclical behavior that will cause sabotage in situations and with other people.

There is hope though, we can break the cycle. We must first accept that we have some internal damages that need to be addressed. For some of you, this may mean seeking counseling or professional help, for others, this may mean addressing the actual person and situation. Whichever choice that you ultimately decide, the prevalent one that you will make is the one that results in a mentality switch from internal negligence and self-sabotaging to self-care and life-transformation. If you heal within, you’ll prevent the triggers that cause you to hurt others.

Self-Care is Important! You deserve to live a life that is free from burden, hurt and regrets. Choose today to live a better life!

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Jasmine Merrill

Jasmine Merrill

Author | Speaker | Writing Coach at The WRITE Goals
Jasmine Merrill is a 5x Author, Inspirational Speaker, and Entrepreneur in Kansas City, Missouri. After spending several years in college and becoming a single mom, Jasmine felt led to build inspiration, leadership, and empowerment in the communities around her. In 2017, Jasmine went on to developing a community outreach, SMILE (Single Moms Inspiring Leading Empowering), which catapulted her speaking career and ultimately launched her into becoming an Author. In Late 2017, Jasmine went on to publish her first book, “UNVEILED”, which transformed lives on both National and International levels. After publishing her first book, Jasmine began speaking at local events and for various organizations. Her uplifting and empowering topics such as, “The Power of You” and “Dashing to your Destiny”, have built communities of inspirational leaders and powerful entrepreneurs. In 2018, Jasmine was afforded the opportunity to come onboard a national newspaper publication company, The Dispatch Post USA, where she successfully contributed over 30 inspirational articles as a Journalist. A few of the articles contributed to the newspaper eventually were selected for an International Magazine, Inspiring Lives Magazine, thus creating an even larger platform for her words of empowerment. Later in 2018, Jasmine went on to publishing 2 additional inspirational books, “The Second Wind” and “How Big Is Your Faith?” As her voice began to inspire the world, so did her passion for transforming lives. As Jasmine continued publishing books, she realized that there were so many people who desired to share their story with the world, so Jasmine sought out to create a platform for aspiring Authors. In 2019, Jasmine launched her Author Consulting and Publishing company, The WRITE Goals, where she assisted aspiring writers into becoming Inspirational Authors. Since launching that business in 2019, Jasmine went on to publish several other books, further providing inspiration, leadership, and empowerment to the world. Everywhere she goes, Jasmine makes it a habit of transforming the mind and inspiring the heart of every person she encounters. She hopes that every person she can cross paths with will walk away feeling empowered and unstoppable. In her own words, “The only thing stopping you from becoming all that you can be, is the thought in your head that says, I Can’t.” Believe in the power of YOU.
Jasmine Merrill

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